I will miss your heart so tender, and I will love this love forever.

What does it mean to exist? To use up all goodness in the world, to discover and eventually, declare, ones purpose and stay here. But in order to do all that, one must feed off motivation, inspiration, the feeling of wanting to keep moving forward each and every day, but what if it isn't about moving forward all of a sudden? What if there is some sort of obstacle, or human flesh and bone, in the way of this generic worldly routine, that you can't help but yield for? I'm sorry great power above me to have to break this cycle of yours. But some things are hard to leave behind. And I don't believe they should be, if both ends meet, why should they separate? Why should it be given up on? Maybe i've been having child-like thoughts and hopes for too many years, or maybe I just refuse to give in and give up. NO, I will not just give it up so easily over a stupid mistake of mine, this is something for stay, can't you see? What if it's about the want and need to go back and fix things, getting closer each time, until there is no more room for mistakes, or should i say, THERE WILL BE NO MISTAKES MADE, PERIOD.

Because we have ALL made some of those, and sometimes it takes more than once to really learn it the hard way, whether they were little mistakes, or mistakes that affect your life forever. Mistakes ARE made to be learned from, and yeah, they might, and probably will cause self- loathing, but that's the price of being at fault.

And it's feelings like this, looking out the window where there are endless possibilities to the possible amount of water falling down from space. What is space? I haven't thought of that one in a long time. And I remember when I was younger, and I'd go to the near by pool and I can't remember how big the pool was but i'd tie my hair up, take a deep breathe, and dive across the pool, from one side to the other, without going up once. And sometimes i'd go under and close my eyes and imagine all the things impossible, because I was under water, and I was holding my breathe, and what rules exist then? And I specifically remember once on vacation, the pools had clear windows at the bottom, and i'd go under and talk to the creatures behind the glass, and i'd come back up and be in this world, once again.